My life turned upside down.

The days grew long with in the perpetual darkness,

Which engulfed my world everyday we all seem,

To suffer from the depressions this world brings,

Neglecting to see the better times the light from the shadows.

My life turned upside down within an instant,

Just like a flip of a light switch with in an second,

Everything goes dark but I need to look for the flash,

A single flash of light from the most distant source.

Although hesitant I need to remember not everything,

Is friendly within this world but the light is warm,

It seems to soothe and put me at my ease as I relax,

Within the confines of my cell a born fighter ready to fight.

Josi ‘s world #1

I could hear the harrowing screams if the prisoners throughout the prison grounds, as the chill in the air was one that cut straight through josi’s bones. As he sat shackled and chained, it was different to other disciplines he’d seen other kids his age go through as he grew up on earth within the mortal world and the pain and suffering dished out to prisoners within Hellidon Bay a designated teen discipline re-education centre. 

He sat on the cold concrete slabbed bed with nothing on but something that stopped him seeing anything around him it seemed to cling to his face and wrapped around his head. Tight enough so it felt as if it was pinching his skin, the mask seemed to have a small rough cut circular piece joined to it which forced his mouth open slightly sometimes the soldiers grabbed him tight and forced something down which made him feel as if he was choking the more he fought the more pain he was in. This rubber that they forced down his throat meant he was suffocating momentarily as they poured hot liquid down. He could feel the warmth through a tube and the force it hit his stomach made him feel sick.

 In a moment his mind drifted to what had led him to the prison life. The nightmare he now found himself in a state of perpetual darkness unable to see or talk to anyone. They had given the Prince who had fallen from the loving grace of his family lesser sentences. As the only thing he could hear was the continuous crowing of the crow and the drip of the water he couldn’t see where it was. He grew scared but refused to show it unsure how long he had been in this personal hell he waited for the tube to be removed as he felt that he would pass out until they removed it pulled him to his feet they forced him to walk forward as they hooked large guide irons to the neck collar so they maintained the distance from the blinded prisoner.

The child could feel the sharp spikes in his neck as they pulled along him. Jodi remembered the King’s men explaining some or was he privy to watching another prisoner he was no longer sure things got mixed up in his mind. Some days he couldn’t even remember who he was. Sometimes he couldn’t remember his family or even if he had one, he was sore and could.

“our job is to keep you alive by orders of the king. But that does not mean comfortable, heck it doesn’t even mean you have rights. We want to know who you’re working with. Mithra tried to focus on the gruff hard tones of the man’s voice as he desperately tried to cling onto anything.

“Fuck you, I’m not saying.. You will kill me before I talk.“ Josi clarified that he would not talk he wasn’t giving anyone up.

“ your seventeen, you have the rest of your life if you behave and give up the names of your associates home.“ The gruff voice replied as they made the child lie down, tilted at an angle with his head in a bucket of freezing cold water the device had been designed so he would fully know the water around his head “we have administered two drafts of hallucinogenic drugs I advise you swallow it’s designed..” The gruff voice stopped josi knew he had no choice. But remained quiet, and the soldiers forced his head under the water, which caused the child to fight out more than usual as they held his head under the water. With only the tip of the circular metallic device showing. Intermittently , they would bring his head from the water and allow him to take the short breaths.

“Who is Phoenix? What is Phoenix?“ the gruff voice demanded an answer as Mithra’s was scared and trying to fill his lungs as much as he could realise he was not in charge but would hold out for as long as he could.

“FUCK YOU ASSHOLE.“ He seemed to scream at the soldiers unaware that the man had signalled to lower the boys head back into the water Mithra’s knew one thing to hide his gang from everyone even his best friends didn’t know about Phoenix. This punishment continued for months, although it felt like an eternity.

Day in and day out the same routines he had split from his family and friends and thrown back into the centre of hell. Mithras knew one thing he never talked about the inner sanctum that the Dark Lore gang seemed to act as a cover for he was a young child scared but refused to let it show as he was put through the torturous anguish and pain and refused to show the pain he was in. As they moved him from one torturous interrogation routine through to another, the child refused to talk as they took the mask off finally granting him the chance to see where he was. Albeit briefly because he was not giving the information that they required. Mithras was in serious trouble and as far as the knights could tell it was getting worse.

Josi’s sat in the dark cell and listened to the dripping water which he could now tell came from the other side of his cell. Where a slight warmth could be felt as he looked around the room he wanted to leave this nightmare behind him. But he did not know where he would go. As the sound of the cells slamming shut echoed around the chambers where his cell situated as the soldiers left him to think and digest the work that was being carried out. The young teenager pulled his legs to his chest and tried to get comfortable on the cold concrete slab which had become his only source of rest from the pain of the punishments and interrogations that they made him to go through.

They marched him back to his cell where they left with the mask firm at around his heard a loud bang which echoes around the room. within minutes scared confused and alone.with just his thoughts for company. He contemplated where his life went wrong. 

 “My name is Josi, I stand accused of trying to improve my world, my good deeds now turned to evil syns. Now you  know me as darkness, you know me as shadow that haunts the dimensions. For standing against

Happy new year

Happy new year

Let’s hope this year is bigger and better than 2019 was.


I know what I’m planning to do and thats.


1 Create more content from poems, stories, reviews of books, music, films, restaurant’s.

2 I will be focusing more on my writing.

3 I plan on finishing more openlearn courses in various subjects

4 I plan on attending more self development courses.

5 plan on advertising my merchandise (teeshirts, hoodies, sweatshirts, mugs, posters, tapestries, pens, caps)

6 identify how to promote my content (as currently there’s no promotion of my blogs. Esp as wordpress has decided I can’t upgrade this site .)

7 To help others and return to the advisory services, help the homeless, volunteer at the hospital, volunteer at food bank. (According to DWP I’m not well enough to work due to COPD and asthma. So will repay society back in a different way.)

8. NOT ALLOW MY ILLNESS TO BEAT ME (by finding things I can do to help me)

9 Release my poetry and story books (with plan of creating my own  shop)

10 Donate a range of books to charity (esp children’s charities)

11 donate money to several charities of my choice.  (Mind, Samaritans, foods bank etc.)

12 going to London for a meeting.



Too those who tell me get a proper job . Even though I have good references  and qualifications I’m chronically ill. Out of 150 job applications I sent out I got interview requests from 9. So looks like my only way to work is through setting up my business.

A personal blog

I grew up comparing my family to another. My area of town to another.  I was considered to live in the golden posh end of town and the other end was the rough end.

When deep down I didn’t care that my friends in the rough end was worse off. Didn’t have computers or TV in their rooms, no firmal rules for dinner times or routines.

In fact looking back on it they had things I didn’t, rules more relaxed but family who didn’t rey on belts or slippers  for punishment still we became friends. Sure it was frowned on by where ok lived but I didn’t care. Because we’re all human.

Since my childhood I’ve learnt many lessons the hardest way  i could. Now I have nothing no longer talking to the same friends.

I would always bend over backwards to make sure someone was ok. After all I was brought up in single parent family from the age of three till 11. Where I was taught by church and nan to help those in need, and stand up to let .An old person who needed a chair on the bus or crossing the road. Now I’m I’ll possibly no chance of work . But I can still help charities.


2020 won’t be any difference I’ve selected this year to be the make or break year for me


Boxing day

Traditionally in England they celebrate boxing day which is on the 26th December.

A time where servants were permitted to celebrate often having time off work.

As they worked Christmas day keeping the house and their masters fed.

They would celebrate the birth of Christ and be handed presents often in boxes by their employers.

Another traditional matter is fox hunting with hounds but this is banned now but the hunt remains.

Perhaps it was a time the poor box was opened in church and given to the poor.

But what ever the history today it’s a time to eat the left over food and drink.


I hope where ever you are that you’ll enjoy your time today. I know if I’m well enough I will be giving food and drink to the homeless.



They are human too

A storm is blowing outside today,

I can’t help think of those worse affected

The men and women on the streets

Where I once slept.


I wish I could be out helping them

Letting them know some of us still care and fight their corner but illness.

Keeps me in bed lucky to be home

Due to flare up of COPD asthma

But still I can’t stop thinking of

The people on the streets less fortunate than myself.


Please don’t walk past and do nothing

Please say hello as it could save a life

Wish them merry Christmas offer them a drink and food.

Just like I do even though I live on limited means.

Remember they are human to.